The Host asks for a Volunteer to Lead the meeting. The Host is able to screen share while the Lead reads the script. 


The Lead can ask for introductions at this time or before shares are given.


COSA Diversity Statement

  • COSA Diversity is consistent with the Third Tradition of COSA, which states that the only requirement for COSA membership is that our lives have been affected by compulsive sexual behavior.
  • The COSA Fellowship welcomes all genders, all varieties of relationship to the addict, all religious and spiritual preferences, all employment statuses, all marital statuses, all ethnicities, cultures, and languages. COSA does not discriminate on the basis of class, financial status, sexual orientation or gender identification, physical or mental challenges, race, or national origins.
  • In COSA, we find hope whether or not there is a sexually addicted person currently in our lives.
  • COSA Diversity is consistent with the First Tradition of COSA, which states that our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon COSA unity.

Meeting Format

(download pdf)  


Lead Reads Aloud

Lead chooses a version of the Serenity Prayer to lead group in. (Short Version, We, Long)



Welcome to the COSA Zoom Room. My name is _________and I am doing service for this meeting.

Before we begin, please unmute your audio to join in saying the _________ version of the Serenity Prayer

‘Me’ Version (Short Version)
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.


‘We’ Version 
God, grant us the serenity to accept the things we cannot change,
Courage to change the things we can,
And wisdom to know the difference.


The Serenity Prayer (Long Version)
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.  

Patience for the things that take time,
Appreciation for all that I have,
And tolerance for those with different struggles. 

Freedom to live beyond the limitations of my past ways,
The ability to feel your love for me and our love for each other,
And the strength to get up and try again even when I feel it is hopeless.


Lead Reads Aloud

We welcome you to the COSA Zoom Room Fellowship and extend to you our support and friendship. COSA is for people whose lives have been affected by another person’s compulsive sexual behavior. COSA is an anonymous Twelve-Step recovery program for spiritual development, no matter what our religious or philosophical beliefs.

COSA offers hope whether or not there is a sexually addicted person currently in our lives.

In COSA, we begin to experience relief from our isolation in the safety of an anonymous gathering with others who share our stories. Everything that is said in the group meetings and between members must be held in confidence. This promotes open and honest sharing of our experience, strength, and hope, creating a trust level that many of us have never before experienced.

By working the Twelve Steps in COSA, we gain a new perspective on ourselves and our lives. If you decide you are one of us, we welcome you with open arms.

If there are Newcomers
Newcomers Introduce themselves
Lead demonstrates the “Applause” sign


If you are attending a COSA meeting for the first time, will you please unmute and tell us your first name?

This is not done to embarrass you, but so we may welcome you. 

Welcome. We’re glad you are here.

In a face to face meeting it is appropriate to thank each speaker after their share. In the zoom room, we borrow the applause sign from American Sign Language as an alternate way of expressing our gratitude.

If you are interested in literature or an email list, please talk with the host or leader after the meeting.

Lead askes for a Volunteer to read the 12 Steps “Popcorn Style” (2-3 Steps each volunteer) or, one participant read all 12 Steps.



12 Steps of COSA

1. We admitted we were powerless over compulsive sexual behavior — that our lives had       become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked God to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we  understood God, praying only for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to others, and to practice these principles in all areas of our lives. 

Lead asks for a Volunteer to read the Tradition number that coordinates with the current month (i.e. January = Tradition 1) or, one participant read all 12 Traditions.

12 Traditions of COSA

1. Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon COSA unity.

2. For our group purpose there is but one ultimate authority — a loving God as expressed in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern.

3. The only requirement for COSA membership is that our lives have been affected by compulsive sexual behavior. The members may call themselves a COSA group, provided that, as a group, they have no other affiliation.

4. Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or COSA as a whole.

5. Each group has but one primary purpose — to carry its message to those who still suffer. We do this by practicing the Twelve Steps ourselves.

6. A COSA group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the COSA name to any related facility or outside enterprise, lest problems of money, property and prestige divert us from our primary purpose.

7. Every COSA group ought to be fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.

8. COSA should remain forever non-professional, but our service centers may employ special workers.

9. COSA, as such, ought never be organized; but we may create service boards or committees directly responsible to those they serve.

10. COSA has no opinion on outside issues; hence the COSA name ought never be drawn into public controversy.

11. Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, films, television, and other public media of communication. We need guard with special care the anonymity of all Program members.

12. Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our traditions, ever reminding us to place principles before personalities.

Lead Reads Aloud

Etiquette and Guidelines for Sharing in Meetings

To keep the room Safe and Healthy, We COSAs:

  • Make a habit of arriving on time and staying for the entire meeting.

  • Are aware certain attire may be triggering for others and dress accordingly.

  • Stay attentive, avoid cell phone use/texting, minimize distracting movements, eating, etc.

  • Keep our video on. We inform “Everyone” in the chat box as a courtesy to the group if we must turn off our video.

  • Consider using ear buds if another person around us is able to hear anything.

  • Meetings are private and anonymous.  We make sure that we are the only person others in the meeting can see and that meeting participants are only visible to us. 

  • Communicate any barriers at the beginning of the meeting. 

  • Mute our microphone unless sharing or when asked to unmute by the Lead.

  • Members are asked to share their own Experience, Strength, and Hope (ESH) with the group, speaking in “I” terms (rather than using ‘you’) and keeping the focus on their own journey.

  • Do not refer to specific “Acting Out” places, people, or behaviors, but rather speak in general terms and focus on how we feel.

  • Focus on the tools of the program, including the Steps, Traditions, and Slogans.

  • Advice-giving, telling others what they should do, judging or commenting on what people say or cross talk, including directing comments to a group member, or using another participants name during share, are all strongly discouraged.

  • It is part of the Trusted Servant’s role as well as Members’  responsibility to gently speak up if someone shifts away from these guidelines.

  • Please remember that chats sent to ‘Everyone’ may be saved by everyone attending the meeting.

Host asks for volunteer to be a Time Keeper. Time Keeper informs group how they will let group members know set time is up.

So that all attendees get an opportunity to share, please limit your shares to Three Minutes.

This will allow time for Re-shares and Check-ins (Physical, Emotional, Mental, Social, Spiritual, Sexual). Is someone willing to be Time Keeper?

Now it’s time to go to today’s topic and then the floor will be open for sharing.

The closing is read 5 minutes before the end of the meeting.

Host Posts link in CHAT for email sign up:  COSA Zoom Room Topic Email Sign Up



Lead can choose to close with “I Put My Hand in Yours” or “The Serenity Prayer”




Host can share any Business  

Room is open for open chat





That is all the time we have for sharing. If you didn’t get a chance to share, please share with someone after the meeting. 

To sign up for weekly meeting topics the link can be put in the chat.

The Seventh Tradition

Now is the time for us to honor the Seventh Tradition to be ‘fully self-supporting, declining outside contributions.

Our groups have no established dues. Funds collected cover expenses such as website and PayPal fees, delegate fees, and donations to the ISO. At the end of local COSA meetings, a basket is passed for our Seventh Tradition.

In the Zoom room we have the easy option of making contributions via PayPal donation. Your donations are appreciated and tax deductible whether weekly, monthly or yearly; CZR is a 501 c 3 organization.

I Put My Hand in Yours

Please unmute and join me in saying the closing:

I put my hand in yours, and together we can do what we could never do alone. No longer is there a sense of hopelessness, no longer must we each depend upon our own unsteady willpower. We are all together now, reaching out our hands for power and strength greater than ours, and as we join hands, we find love and understanding beyond our wildest dreams.” 

– Rozanne S. From I Put My Hand in Yours. Copyright 1968 by Overeaters Anonymous, Inc. Reprinted by permission of Overeaters Anonymous, Inc.


 Are there any COSA-related announcements?